The Gifts of Coaching
by JAMES TRAUB
“If you want to know what people value, you need to ask them.”
During December’s TCC Program, we had the exciting opportunity to hear from a panel of 5 coaching clients exactly what it was about their recent coaching experience that they felt was so valuable.
There were a number of surprises for me during this discussion—unexpected elements of the coaching process these individuals valued (and recalled fondly) that weren’t what I normally focus on when I think about the ‘value’ of my coaching.
As coaches, we often pride ourselves on our ability to help others grow in self-awareness and see things through an alternative (potentially more helpful) lens or perspective.
We know that individuals often get ‘stuck’ in habitual thought patterns and perspectives that shape their beliefs (and thus drive their behavior), and that these habits often get in the way of achieving the things they want, both personally and professionally.
But just because we’re coaches doesn’t mean we’re immune to habitual thinking or failing to examine a situation from alternative points of view.
So, I found it refreshing to set aside what I ‘thought’ was valuable about coaching, and to instead immerse myself in the diverse views and experiences of these individuals.
Questions the panelists responded to included:
What prompted you to consider coaching?
What was the original reason or outcome you were looking for?
What was it about the initial conversation (with the coach) that had you decide to move forward with them?
Can you share a question or intervention your coach made that was a pivotal moment for you?
What qualities about your coach would have you refer him or her to others?
Each answer provided insight into what that client valued, such as:
The coach’s ability to quietly, easily ‘cut through her ego’ in a way that didn’t trigger defensiveness…
Having a coaching process in place, yet also a willingness to adjust that process to fit the needs of the individual…
How naturally and nimbly the coach kept the conversation flowing and helped her to navigate her inner resistance…
The coach’s ongoing belief and confidence in her, especially in moments of self-doubt…
How the coach encouraged incremental growth, and created space for that…
How the coach was always ready with something new that kept me moving and growing…
How well the coach prepared before each session and was ready with questions that kept the trajectory of the coaching process moving forward…
What these clients appeared to value most was their coach’s presence, direction, willingness to tailor the coaching process to the specific needs of the individual, and their ability to help the client evolve, grow, and achieve the results they were looking for.
It’s worth noting that nothing at all was said about assessments, technology, the coach’s website, social media posts, price, or coaching methodology!
If you happened to miss December’s program, I highly encourage you to watch the recording and challenge your preconceived notions of what your potential clients are looking for and what creates value for them.
Thank you Martha for putting this wonderful session together!
More about James Traub
James is a Winston-Salem, NC based life coach helping men to create stronger and more connected relationships. Through workshops, retreats, and 1:1 coaching he equips men with the skills they need to turn tension and conflict into connection and collaboration. He is also the founder of the Winston-Salem Brotherhood, a community of men dedicated to fellowship, personal growth, and the cultivation of healthy, mature masculinity.